teeth schmeeth
it is time for my annual dental examination.
they don't ring you up anymore, they just send lovely postcards. mine has a picture of a smiling hyena and says "you're never too young to floss".
can you be too old to floss? ben?
anyway the dentist scares me. not the dentist herself, she is lovely. it is more when they numb my mouth and i can feel all the chemicals go in and every time i am sure that i will never be able to sing again..
also scary is how much it all costs. i live in constant terror that one day i may have to pay for a whole new mouth of teeth.. and it doesn't seem to matter how much you brush either (if children are reading this don't listen to me it is all lies you must brush and floss twice a day it is good for you). i brush me lots, and i can't remember it having the slightest effect on how unimpressed the dentist is when she looks into your mouth that first time. actually that is the most scary part. that disaproving look, the knowing glance at her assistant that says "obviously hasn't been taking proper care of her oral hygeine."
this hurts. especially because i like to be clean. well, i don't just like it, in fact i tend to overcompensate for other things by being ridiculously clean.
i don't want to go to the dentist. maybe i should just pull all my teeth out and live on smoothies and baby food. mm, existance through a straw...
posted by Natalie @ 7:59 am
19 Comments:
The trick is to avoid dentists all together. I go once every three years (I really hope no children are reading this), and although the dentists are always upset with my oral hygeine, they're not more upset than usual. Then, I only get hurt, chemicaled and pay a lot once every three years.
This is not necessarily the best idea though.
I get emails from my dentist. They always end with: "we have taken the liberty of booking an appointment for you".
Which reminds me. I am also due for a checkup. I'm not so scared this time though because my dentist seems to be impressed with me ever since I quit smoking.
Do I even have a dentist?
Anyway, they always complement me on having good teeth.
Teeth are important. Teeth are the second thing I see on a girl, after eyes or something.
To all those kids who are supposedly reading Natalie's blog - get braces if you have the opportunity! It makes your teeth not crooked. And that's hot. And you want to be hot. When you're older.
but not now.
there are swarms of children who read this blog. you heard me: swarms.
Swarms eh?
Rise up my minions, and seize the internet for King Dave!
comment deleted. how scandalous. my suspicion has been aroused. who was it? what did it say? i must have answers. i must be included in part of the loop. i am so alone and uninformed outside the circumference of this blog.
The best trick to avoiding dentistry is to be a non-corporeal artificial intelligence.
junjunjunJAH! junjunjunJAH!
boys are a funny species. but i do like them.
I'm impressed with anyone who quits smoking too.
...hmmm, maybe I should be a dentist?
Straws! One of the best inventions ever. It makes my glass of water soooo much more exiting. People asked if I was drinking Vodka yesterday...
heh heh..which people?
...controlled by a large parasitic plant.
junjunjunJAH! jun jahdajah da daa
You need to ask? Polly of course.
junjunjunJAH! junjunjunJAH!
Baby food is good and yum! I should know...I get 6 bowls of it ready every day. I have to taste test too to check it's not too warm!
Lambs fry and bacon is very yummy!
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Oh and I hate dentists too!
(it is much cheaper to go to the dentists at the hospital)
i will keep that in mind.. especially cos i like hospitals. that is where jd and dr cox and all my other best friends live.
it's a shame about yomcat, i was kind of hoping for a mystery (but not creepy) commenter..
I wanna join in the commenting funness too. That reminds me, my dentist was supposed to tell me if I need my wisdom tooth out... hmm, maybe I'd rather not know! I had never thought about the chemicals in mouth-singing thing before- now I'm going to be paranoid about it when I visit the dentist. Oh and Pete's thing about noticing teeth- so true! In psych we learnt that the major feature for attractiveness ratings was the mouth (which I suppose includes teeth as well as lips). On second thoughts, maybe I should chase up my dentist- I don't want a stupid wisdom tooth pushing all my other teeth crooked...
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